What an incredible Sunday (March 7th) it was. Many came forward to get prayed for. Many were set free from the bondage of unforgiveness. I’ve heard so many stories of people who have come up to me since Sunday and said that they had to learn to forgive, because if they didn’t then how could they expect God to forgive them! Many said that they had to make a phone call to someone that had hurt them and just tell that that they had forgiven them in their heart! I want to elaborate on something that I talked about last week. I made that comment that “Forgiveness, is not the same as Reconciliation. You must forgive, but that does not mean that all relationships are to reconciled.” I just want to show a more in depth way to look at this. We should forgive EVERYONE, but that doesn’t mean that the relationship must be restored, or should ever be restored. Now, I’m not telling you to not reconcile. We should ALWAYS try to reconcile relationships when it is possible. Sometimes it’s not possible to do so! Let me give you a more in depth look at this issue:
God’s forgiveness of our sins: “God has forgiven me, I must forgive”
“Forgive each other just as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32).When offended, forgiveness means I surrender attitudes of revenge to God in recognition of his authority, providential purpose and forgiveness of my sins. But this can take place in the context of my relationship with God apart from my offender. Forgiveness can occur apart from the confession and repentance of the offender.
Reconciliation:
Differing from forgiveness, reconciliation is a process that is conditioned on the attitude and actions of the offender. Its aim is restoration of a broken relationship—which is often a process.Those who commit significant and repeated offenses must be willing to recognize that reconciliation is a process. In many cases, even if the offender confessed his wrong to the one he hurt, and appealed for forgiveness, the offended person could justifiably say, “I forgive you, but it might take some time for me to regain trust and restore our relationship.” The evidence of genuine forgiveness is freedom from a vindictive or vengeful response (see: Romans 12:17-21).
But such forgiveness does not always automatically grant the same level of relationship back—especially when trust has been deeply betrayed. Even when God forgives our sins, He does not promise to remove all consequences created by our actions. Being forgiven, restored, and trusted again is a great experience. Yet it is important for those who hurt others to understand that their attitude and actions will affect the process of rebuilding trust. Words alone are not enough.
When someone has been significantly hurt, and feels hesitant about restoration with her offender, it is right and wise to look for changes in the offender before allowing reconciliation to begin. This is especially true when the offense has been repeated. Reconciliation requires us to offer a repentant person an opportunity to demonstrate repentance and to regain trust. However, when a person has consistently behaved in a harmful and irresponsible manner, he must accept the fact that reconciliation will be a slow and difficult process.
Taken from article from www.thinkpoint.wordpress.com (Click to view whole article)
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